Yesterday on the way to work I spent my half an hour journey reading the Metro, common practice for me and all the other rush hour commuters on a Friday morning. The metro usually manages to pipe up my anger somehow, being pretty much a free version of the Daily Mail but that day something caught my eye that irritated me even more than usual. It was an article about a trans-women  a teacher called Lucy Meadows who had been found dead in her home, a probable suicide. The first thing that caught my eye was the headline: “Classroom Miss who was a Sir is found dead”. I thought this was rather callous but really what was to be expected of the newspaper. What annoyed me even more was the fact that the picture published was an image of Lucy pre-treatment, surely not how she would have wanted to be remembered.

Further investigation revealed some rather startling and sad facts. The Daily Mail had picked up on the teacher’s decision to start living as a women and decided to make a massive news story of it. Not only did they publish an article complaining about the (rightly) casual attitude of the school to the announcement, but the journo every lefty loves to hate, Richard Littlejohn, wrote a nasty transphobic article attacking Miss Meadows, not only for being transgender, but also attacking her ability be around school children, saying that she shouldn’t be teaching and that having a teacher who has a sex change would confuse and damage the children.

“Nathan Upton is entitled to his gender reassignment surgery, but he isn’t entitled to project his personal problems on to impressionable young children.

By insisting on returning to St Mary Magdalen’s, he is putting his own selfish needs ahead of the well-being of the children he has taught for the past few years.

It would have been easy for him to disappear quietly at Christmas, have the operation and then return to work as ‘Miss Meadows’ at another school on the other side of town in September. No-one would have been any the wiser.

But if he cares so little for the sensibilities of the children he is paid to teach, he’s not only trapped in the wrong body, he’s in the wrong job.”

Littlejohn claims to have sympathy for trans-persons, but his continued use of “he” to describe Miss Meadows strongly hints at his real feelings. I cannot say whether the article contributed to Meadows’ probable suicide, but either way nobody deserves to be attacked in such a way. To say a sex-change is a “selfish need” is a ridiculous and offensive statement to make, by somebody who has no idea what it feels like to feel trapped in the wrong body.

Unfortunately it isn’t just the right wing media engaging in these sort of attacks. Julie Burchill caused controversy in the Observer three months ago in a scathing attack on trans-women, calling them men “with their cock[s] cut off and then plead[ing] special privileges as women.” In fact trans-phobia is common in some branches of radical feminism, with women believing there is no place in the movement for trans-women. They think that anyone born biologically male carries the same male privileges as a cis-gendered male. If even a left wing movement like feminism is rife with transphobia, then no wonder it is so widely accepted! I know very few people personally who refer to trans-persons as their preferred pro-nouns, in fact many refer to them as “He, she, it, whatever.” Why is this acceptable? People are hesitant to come across as sexist or racist or homophobic in this day and age, yet they don’t give a damn about coming across as trans-phobic. It seems to be accepted as the norm that transexuals are weird and it’s okay to be confused or disgusted by them.

Backtrack to my journey to work. On the same page is an article about Justine McNally, an 18 year old who has now been jailed for posing as a boy and tricking another teenage girl into having sex with her. Of course what she has done is terrible, deceptive and I can’t imagine how awful it must be for the poor girl she duped. However at the same time one cannot help wondering why McNally did it. Clearly she is confused about her gender, and was probably desperate to be comfortable in herself. Though what she did was horrible, I think perhaps she did not do it maliciously. This isn’t the first time this has happened, the case of Gemma Barker, who posed as three different boys to deceive girls  cropped up last year, and she was also jailed.  Teenagers need to be told about gender issues and taught to love and accept themselves whoever they are.  If we lived in a world where trans and gender-queer issues were more talked about and accepted maybe things like this wouldn’t happen.

This is pretty much the first “feminist” book I ever read (unless you count Caitlin Moran, which I probably should), and I had high hopes, but alas I turned out to be disappointed. I couldn’t even finish this book. In fact I got to page 80 and got so sick of it that I had to stop. This book claims to stand up for girls of all backgrounds when really it talks about only straight, slim, white middle class, high achieving girls whose struggle with their self esteem stems from a need for perfection. They apparently believe being fat to be the worst thing one can possibly be (talk about privileged). Martin generalises enormously and appears to be blaming the parent’s for their daughter’s struggles. She mentions nothing about people from low income backgrounds, women of colour, homosexuals or anyone else who also may suffer from eating disorders or struggle with their own body image (ie. anybody).

Not everybody with an eating disorder fits into the bracket she talks about. There has been no attempt to explain body image in girls who have to struggle to live comfortibly, to do well in school, or who have other issues to deal with because people from these backgrounds also have eating disorders. So clearly not everybody struggling with their body image feels that way because they are under pressure to live a perfect life.Granted she is talking from her own personal viewpoint but with the amount of interviews she conducts and the fact she is claiming to speak for a generation you would expect more. She claims to be a third wave feminist, yet there is no trace of inter-sectional feminism in this book at all. I am a white working class British women with incredibly low self-esteem and I could not relate to Perfect Girls, Starving Daughters at all. If anything she is speaking for the minority of women with body image issues; the white middle class all-American girl. If you don’t fit into that category, don’t bother reading.

“Look, no tan lines! Topless Gisele Bundchen soaks up the sun in bikini bottoms”

Two recent headlines from everyone’s favourite defender of morals, the Daily Mail. The first one has about 20 pictures of Rihanna in various states of undress that kept me scrolling down the page for an age. When it comes to celebrities they are happy to publish whatever scandelous pictures they can find. When it comes to the Royals however they would NEVER do such a thing. It’s an invasion of privacy! They  shout. Of course it’s not just the Daily Mail, they are just one of the most obvious and easy to pick on examples. It’s not just the press who are outraged by the French photographs of Kate topless, it’s everybody else in the country too. Facebook statuses are abound, stating that it’s terrible what has happened to Kate and how she isn’t “that sort of person” who would go around flaunting herself! Clear indications of double standards – if she was – ahem – “that sort of person” it wouldn’t matter at all. I imagine that if the photographs has been of a celebrity such as Tulisa, nobody would have given a damn. This is quite a sad attitude to have. The underlying message is clear. Only “sluts” go around revealing their bodies and a classy women like Kate would never do so! Firstly somebody’s worth isn’t measured by what they wear and secondly women who go around sunbathing topless still do not deserve to have their privacy invaded! In fact this all shouldn’t be such a big a deal. Lot’s of women go around sunbathing topless and Kate doing it on holiday doesn’t reflect anything bad on her. One could argue that it is a lot less of an issue in European countries such as France so at least the photographs were not portrayed in a sleazy way.

The Royal couple themselves have decided to sue the magazine concerned, Closer France. Indeed, it isn’t right to take photographs of a women on a private holiday, but then again that counts for anybody, be it a future queen or a model. In fact that shouldn’t just go for young women, but anybody.  Kate says that she is suing them to stop things like this happening in the future but it is unlikely to stop the press, and even if they stop doing it to royals they have no scruples about doing it to anyone else.

The reaction towards the recent photographs of Kate also highly contrasts with how the press reacted to the naked photographs of Prince Harry recently. In fact many British newspapers published the photographs headlined things like  ”Heir It is! Pics of Naked Harry you’ve already seen on the Internet!” (The Sun) and “Harry’s Naked Romp” (The Mirror .)

It’s okay everyone, he’s a bloke.

Hell, the Sun edition is even a printed souvenir edition! Another royal, yet not nearly as much outrage. Is it okay for a man to be running around naked but not a women? Even though they are the same class, people were a lot less outraged over newspapers printing pictures of Harry but when it comes to the French press we are disgusted. There’s some good old fashioned sexism right there!  Many people have been saying that Kate shouldn’t have taken her top off, knowing that she is going to be targeted by the press, but this isn’t fair. At heart she is just an ordinary women enjoying her holiday in private. Maybe it’s time the British public stopped with our obsession over every detail of a celebrity’s life, be they royalty or somebody off of x-factor. When we stop wanting to see celebrities being spied on and photographed maybe we will stop being supplied it.

“He’s just looking at all the houses,” Zimmerman said. “Now he’s just staring at me.”

Then Zimmerman said the suspicious person, who appeared to be black and in his late teens, had his hand in his waist band. “Something’s wrong with him. He’s coming to check me out.”

RIP Trayvon and every other man, women and child who has been the victim of racist murder

Today I found a recording of a 911 call made by a women at the time of the shooting. In this the lady in question calls the police and tells them she can hear something going on outside. In the background you can hear somebody crying out for help. Then there is a gunshot followed by an end to the cries. It is honestly one of the hardest things I have ever listened to and this is why I decided to write this blog today instead of the one I planned to write about gay marriage. I actually cried whilst listening to it. I think anyone who can should have a listen, though I warn you it is distressing. Click Here.  The recording indicates that whatever scuffle occurred before the shooting, it was clearly not Zimmerman who was the victim. One Daily Mail reader left a comment saying that perhaps it was Zimmerman himself who was crying out, or something not related to the shooting at all. Typical Daily Mail reader claptrap. No way do I believe that a man with a gun who, seconds later, was able to shoot someone, would have been crying out like that. Secondly a witness, Mary Cutcher said “I heard someone crying — not boo-hoo crying, but scared or terrified or hurt maybe…To me, it was a child”. Sounds to me like it was Treyvon. What is most disgusting is the fact that the police have heard these recordings yet Zimmerman is still walking free.

Now I’m not the kind of person who is overly aware of my white privilege. Despite the fact that it was learning about Civil Rights in college that helped me develop my liberal views and hearing stories about my black friends being treated differently because of their skin colour of which I am highly sympathetic, race is not something I think about too often in my daily life. This case has changed that. This child, this innocent 17 year old boy who was out buying sweets and fizzy drinks, who had a clean record, who’s teacher left a lovely comment on the petition set up to find justice for him,  was shot dead in cold blood. And why? Because somebody who should not have been carrying a gun in the first place decided he looked suspicious for probably no other reason than his skin colour and his age. Treyvon Martin is a modern day Emmett Till, a young boy who was brutally murdered because of the colour of his skin  and whose killers are going to get away with it because of institutional racism. It may be naive of me but I didn’t think this kind of thing could happen in the 21st century. I knew about the way the police target black kids, even here in Britain for searches and the like, but I never thought that a man could get away with the murder of a child because he is white and can claim self-defence. Anybody with a brain can see this isn’t self defence. How many other cases like this have gone unnoticed by the general public?

Emmett Till, a 14 year old boy who was brutally murdered in the 1950s for allegedly flirting with a white women. His killers walked free. The case was a catalyst for the Civil Rights movement, but clearly equality has still not been achieved.

An online petition is currently set up and I beg anybody who reads this to sign it. CLICK!!!!!! There needs to be justice for Treyvon Martin. Hate crime is one of the most despicable forms of crime there is. George Zimmerman should not be allowed to get away with this. He is a murderer.

Along with unemployment statistics rising, so too has the bad attitude towards those on benefits. I find this sad, as a lot of time the economic climate is playing a part in this. It is fairly impossible to deny that the economic crisis is causing a rise in unemployment. Not everybody on benefits is a scrounger who does not want to work. Most of us do want to work very much. In fact being unemployed damages self-esteem and causes people to feel depressed and have a low opinion of themselves. Especilly after spending three years working hard and ending up unable to find a job. I’m not saying that a degree should be a fast-track into a high end career, but it should open up opportunities to us. There doesn’t seem to be many of these around though, during times of economic crisis, companies do not want to be training new people. Sales and recruitment are two areas where training schemes are available but these are unlikely to suit everyone. I still believe that there ARE graduate jobs out there. We just need to go about the right way to find them.

The current government has introduced a wide range of apprenticeships, a fantastic idea for school leavers but these are rarely availible to university graduates.  The job centre doesn’t seem to have the slightest idea of how to deal with us either, usually telling us to apply for jobs we are overqualified for. Of course, most of us would be happy with applying for these, but also do apply for graduate jobs too and a little help wouldn’t go amiss. Universities also do not prepare us for what to expect after we graduate. It’s a scary world out there and a push in the right direction may be all we need.

Recently there has been a lot of controversy over the “workfare” schemes, where people were working full time for only their jobseekers allowance and expenses. Graduates have been doing this for years in the form of internships. (I’m not going to get into my views on workfare right now – another time, another place!) Over the last few months the job centre has begun a partnership with an intern recruitment company called Inspiring Interns where you can do an internship whilst still getting your job seekers allowance. I don’t see why this cannot be the case with all internships. They are, after all, a form of work experience. An individual on the workfare scheme would have the same amount of time to look for jobs as somebody who is doing an internship would have. This would make internships available to more people, and would encourage more work with companies taking on graduates. If the government is currently trying to work with businesses to get them to employ more school leavers then they should do the same with companies who employ graduates. With the increase in university leavers who are entering unemployment after they graduate rising then it is time the job centre started to realise that they need to gain the expertise to help graduates as well as other unemployed people. Though a lot of us would be happy to work in jobs we are technically overqualified for in this climate, I do believe that there are some grads out there who don’t even attempt to get graduate jobs, and instead spend months applying for the same jobs as those people without degrees. If they can see that it is possible to make it and give them the self confidence to try, this can only be good for everybody.

“Greedy”, “confused”, and “desperate” are some of the words I have heard used to describe bisexual people. Along with “following a trend” and “trying to be cool.” The truth is more and more people have been coming out as bisexual in recent years and this is often “blamed” on the existence of scene kids and hipsters. They think it’s cool to be bisexual right? Or maybe it’s that there have always been high levels of individuals attracted to members of both genders and it is the accepting liberal sub-cultures that allow them to feel comfortable enough to admit to it. The sad thing about biphobia is that it comes not just from straight people, but also from within the LGBT community itself. Hell, I’ve even heard bisexual people make horrible comments about how there are so many “fake” bisexuals out there…

The first instances of biphobia I encountered were in year 11 when I was around 15. People used to ask certain friends of mine why they were friends with me because “she might fancy you!”. I don’t even need to explain why this is such a stupid, ignorant, bigoted thing to say. Straight people don’t fancy every single member of the opposite sex, so why would I fancy every women I meet? A girl in my geography class asked my best friend if I fancied her. The girl was as ugly on the inside and she was on the outside, so no, I certainly did not fancy her. This is the type of crap bi and homosexual people have to put up with. I’ve even heard friends of mine insist that gay men go around trying to turn straight men gay. No they don’t. In fact I know certain straight men who have seduced gay ones, not the other way round…

It isn’t just straight people who are biphobic though. In fact I have heard with my own ears gay people refer to bisexuals as “greedy”. I’m sure it was meant as a joke, but when people out there genuinely believe that, it’s really not funny. Of course I will stress that it is only the minority of gay people (and straight people) who are biphobic. But it is still a significant amount considering the fact that there is a B in LGBT. There are some lesbians out there who will not date a bisexual women, believing that they are indecisive, less loyal, or going to “turn straight” five minutes later. Last time I went onto the g3 website (a while ago) there was a poll asking whether readers would date a bi girl or not. Why should sexuality even be an issue? My ex girlfriend was absolutely paranoid I would leave her for a man. I adored her, and would never have considered it. There are probably more men out there I’m attracted to than women, but that’s because I get on better with men in general. If I’m going out with someone I am 100% committed to them and wouldn’t even look at anyone else. Promiscuity is another trait constantly linked with bisexual people. Some may be, and if that is how they want to be then fair enough. It is certainly not the case for all of them, no more so than it is with heterosexuals and homosexuals. A few days ago somebody messaged me over the internet saying “Hey I really appreciate the confidence and self awareness required to realise you need both men and women in your life. That’s really cool. When did you know for sure that you were bisexual?”. I found this rediculously patronising. Firstly bisexuals do not “need both men and women in their life”.  Most of us date one person at a time thanks very much, and often don’t “need” anyone. Secondly it doesn’t take “confidence and self awareness” it’s just something you know about yourself. Does it  take confidence and self–awareness to admit you’re straight? I don’t think so.

The way past boyfriends have reacted to my bisexuality has also not always been positive and free from ignorance. One guy who liked me told me that if I wanted to sleep with women whilst I was with him that was okay. Of course my reaction was to turn around and ask him if it was okay for me to sleep with men too, predictably he said “no”. Apparently it’s okay for me to cheat on him so long as it’s with a women. Again the ridiculous assumption that bisexual people “need both men and women”, are polyamorous, and promiscuous rears it’s head. May I stress that I have no problem at all with people who are any of these things, but to make it a stereotype of bisexual people is absolutely ignorant. Needless to say I never did end up going out with that guy, thank god. Another of my exs asked me if I was into threesomes. Here we go again…

Possibly the most insulting thing I have ever heard about bisexuals was a comment one of the girls I worked with in the Student’s Union made. Apparently there were a lot of bisexual girls in  her school and the reason for this was that “they were too ugly to get guys so went for girls instead.” Unfortunately my dislike for confrontation meant I said absolutely nothing. I still kick myself for that. For the most part she was a really lovely girl, who had no idea about my sexuality and probably would have been mortified if she had ever found out how much it had upset me. However it still remains probably the worst thing I have ever heard that has offended me personally. (I was never bullied at school so people haven’t hurt my feelings often, but that hit me to the core.) The fact that everyone else there just laughed  despite knowing full well about me just made the whole situation worse. I don’t consider myself an attractive girl at all, but I’ve never had too much problem getting male attention. I don’t like women out of desperation. I like them because I see beauty in them the same way as I see beauty in men.

The worse thing is, people don’t even seem to see anything wrong with comments like the ones I mentioned above. There is so much emphasis on gay pride, and rightly so, but often bisexual people get missed out. You know what, we aren’t desperate, or confused, or indecisive. We aren’t all promiscuous. Some of us haven’t even slept with someone of the same sex.  Many of us are real human beings who are secure in our sexuality. To anybody out there who thinks bisexuality isn’t real (another ridiculous biphobic comment that often crops up): I know for a fact it does, because I know exactly how I feel and who I am attracted to. You can’t say a feeling doesn’t exist just because you have never felt it. I am not going to be ashamed of admitting my sexuality anymore, just because of the reactions of a minority. It’s time to make that minority even smaller. We are all human, and accepting bisexual people is part of accepting LGBT people in general. We need to stop ignoring biphobia.

Unreal women, and real women, apparently.

And this:

Now these two images are supporting two different ideas, the first that a real women is “curvy” and the second that a real women doesn’t need to wear make-up, hair extensions etc. to look beautiful. I’m going to start by talking about women’s body shape. Is a curvaceous women a real women? I completely disagree with the body image ideals that the media throws out at us every day. As a size 16/18 women, being forced to believe that size 0 is beautiful, and seeing celebrities such as Kate Winslet being called out for being “fat” makes me feel horrific. Whenever I open a magazine such as Cosmo or Company I see images of skinny white women with flawless skin, and a completely hairless body. I am as far from societies ideals of beautiful as it is possible to get. I am overweight, I have a large nose, I have small eyes, I have to shave often, I have thick eyebrows. I am pretty much societies definition of ugly. Yet despite this I still manage to get men liking me, and I still manage to feel good about myself. This is because over the last few years I have begun to realise that the media’s ideal of beauty is not what everybody considers beautiful. It is certainly not what I consider beautiful. I even look at the men that women’s magazines portray as perfect, and I do not find them attractive. George Clooney? No thanks. The famous men I find attractive come more in the form of George Osborne, and Julian Assange. (Mmm). The men I date in real life are usually not classically gorgeous. I usually go for geeky guys, I don’t mind whether they “are too fat” or “too thin”, but men who are muscular don’t attract me at all. I like guys who wear glasses. I like men with flaws. Men who are well dressed, in suits or jumpers and scarves. Guys with nice arms and hands, and eyes than twinkle when they smile.  As long as they make me laugh I’m sold. So not all men are going to find Megan Fox types attractive, if not all women find Brad Pitt attractive. Besides surely it is our own views of ourselves that should matter, before we give a damn about what the opposite sex thinks?

The main backlash to the media’s beauty standards is to create blogs, images, Facebook groups etc. which portray skinny women as unattractive, and to say “real women have curves.” So where does this place women without curves? Where does it place a young flat chested teenage girl, struggling with body image issues like all young girls do? If I saw a Facebook group saying “Fat girls arn’t real women”  I would be extremely hurt. I think it’s safe to say than any slim girls are being hurt just as much by seeing real women being portrayed as only those with curves. Way too many men out there seem to believe they are a special snowflake for finding curvy women attractive – they arn’t. A lot of men find curvy women attractive, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, as they say.  In some ways it is good that curvy women are being complimented, but at the same time insulting someone else for their body size and shape is highly hypocritical. A size 6 women may feel as insecure about their body as one who is size 16 or 26. Real women may be thin or curvy or fat, short or tall or average.  One body shape should not be championed over another. It is true that it is larger women that are mostly targeted by the press as unattractive, but turning this around so that it is skinny women who are made to feel unattractive is not the answer. Instead we should encourage body acceptance whatever size or shape we are. There are many who may turn around and say that promoting the idea that anyone is beautiful is promoting unhealthy living, but not everybody who is overweight is unhealthy, just as not all slim people are healthy. So long as somebody tries to be as healthy as possible, what does it matter what size they are?

The second image I have a problem with for another reason. The idea that a women is not “real” because she wears weave in her hair, wears make up or contact lenses is a ridiculous statement to make. Just because somebody wears make up does not mean they so it just to impress men. I wear make-up occasionally, not because I am trying to impress anybody but because I like how it looks. I think I look okay without it, but I like how eyeliner brings out my eyes. If plastic surgery makes somebody feel better about themselves why should they not get it? I agree that it is sad that some people feel so insecure that they need it, but at the end of the day it is how they feel about themselves that counts, and they are not less “real” for wanting it. We are all “real” whatever we look like, whatever we wear, whether we wear lipstick or not, whether we wear glasses, contacts or neither. There is no way to be a “real women”. All you need to do is be yourself, and be happy with how you are.

]]> http://areliquary.wordpress.com/2012/01/15/so-what-exactly-is-a-real-women/feed/ 4 zoechristodoulou http://areliquary.wordpress.com/2011/12/15/im-all-for-freedom-of-speech-but-pro-ana-sites-worry-me/ http://areliquary.wordpress.com/2011/12/15/im-all-for-freedom-of-speech-but-pro-ana-sites-worry-me/#comments Thu, 15 Dec 2011 21:07:14 +0000 zoechristodoulou http://areliquary.wordpress.com/?p=79 ]]> Over the last year or so I have been a regular user of the casual micro- blogging site, Tumblr. For anyone who doesn’t know, this is sort of like a cross between an ordinary blog and Twitter with pictures. You can choose to use it to blog normally if you wish, but most people just post pictures, videos and quotes. You follow people just like on Twitter. I follow a number of body positive blogs which put forward the attitude that women (and men) should be proud of their bodies no matter what shape or size they are, and that everybody is beautiful in their own way.  These blogs were mainly made in response to so called “pro-ana” blogs. The idea of pro-eating disorder blogs and websites is something that has been around for years. Some of them are simply to offer support for people with eating disorders. But others are different. The sites encourage their readers to try and loose weight in as many ways as possible. They show images of stick-thin men and women and tell people that this is the ideal body size and that anything bigger is disgustingly fat.  Things like this  and this encourage young women to try and get themselves to a certain weight.

“You don’t want food! Food is disgusting, and if you eat it now, you WILL regret it later. You’re not even hungry! Don’t give in. All it will do is make you bigger and further away from you’re goal weight. You want to be skinny and beautiful, don’t you?“

The issue has been in the news over recent years. I used to have a facebook friend who was involved in this sort of thing. She would post hundreds of pictures of extremely skinny women and go on about how she wanted to look like them. Many of her friends replied with comments about how shocking it was, and she just accused them of being jealous. Really they were worried about her mental and physical well being. The idea of a young women being exposed to this sort of thing is depressing. Teenagers are still trying to find out who they are and some are vulnerable to feeling insecure about their looks or weight.  This is a stumbling block on the path to self acceptance.

A few years ago there was a lot of fuss over sites that showed people how to commit suicide, and in my view pro-ana is the same thing. Encouraging other people to starve themselves thin and telling them they are fat for eating, is encouraging them to kill themselves. Of course, it would be impossible to ban sites like this, without bringing in censorship and I am against that for the most part, so it is a problem that is hard to solve. I think setting up support groups and more sites that encourage women to love themselves, whether they are “fat” or thin, tall or short, is the only way to deal with this sort of thing. That is why I am so glad that blogs such as fuckyeahchubbygirls and antithinspo exist on tumblr. A few young women (I assume), making a step in the right direction to encourage their generation to feel good about themselves, whatever their size or shape.

Unsurprisingly it isn’t. I don’t even know where to start when it comes to Twilight. The characters have absolutely no depth to them at all, especially the main character Bella. In fact the only thing about her personality that shines through is that she is a rather rude and spoilt girl. She actually says “ew” when she experiences snow for the first time, and spends the first half of the book trying to avoid the people in school who are actually making an effort to befriend her. In fact the only thing she seems to care about is Edward, a boy who is constantly rude to her from the moment they first set their eyes on each other.

The relationship between Bella and Edward is unhealthy from the start, and that’s before she even finds out he is a vampire. It isn’t natural to be that obsessed with a guy, especially one you have just met. Their entire relationship seems based on a teenage girls idea of a “perfect” relationship, with a man who just can’t keep away from you. It is not the type of thing one would expect to be written by a married women in her thirties. I can completely understand the comparisons people have made between Twilight and badly written fan-fiction.

One thing I did find interesting in the book was the background stories of Edward’s family, something you do not learn much about in the movies. The character of Alice I particularly liked, though I would like to have learnt more about her past and less about Bella and Edward staring into each others eyes. Why Meyer chose to have the vampires sparkle I will never know. Vampires are meant to be dark dangerous creatures of legend, not sparkling in the sun for absolutely no reason at all. Why did they do it? Some kind of skin disease?

The moment Edward started going on about what a creationist he is was the final nail in the coffin.

I may read the other books someday just to see if they get any better, and out of sheer curiosity. I have a lot of better books to read before then though. And the thought of having to read the other three somewhat feels me with dread.

To an extent I think anyone who grows up in a capitalist society is affected by a need for nice things in life, especially those of us who grew up quite comfortably in a middle class home. It is probably worse for us, a generation that has grown up with the internet and mobile phones. As someone who is often down or miserable over things even I admit are ridiculous, I definitely feel this may be part of the reason why I want the latest laptop and phone and why I have such a social network addiction. One of my comforts when I’m feeling bad about myself is to go shopping. Even if it’s just ordering something off of the internet I feel ever so slightly better when I’m spending money on things I don’t really need . I love the excitement of getting it in the post. Buying things makes me feel good. Getting the latest technology makes me happy. I want an ipad even though I don’t really know what it does! I have an ipod nano 4th gen and I’d love to get a Classic now, though that is actually more for practical reasons. I have a lot of music.

The thing with technology is that it is ever-changing and new things are constantly being developed. Whatever phone I get I will probably end up wanting a better one after about six months. I currently have a Blackberry Curve and the more it annoys me the more I want to switch to Android or iphone. Of course the recent problems with blackberry’s internet being down hasn’t helped. The reaction to that incident shows just how reliant on technology we have become over the past few years, people were so angry and felt so isolated, despite still being able to text and call and access the internet on a laptop or computer.